“Don’t you get… lonely?”
Well, yes. We are social creatures.
All this new-wave advice says “learn to love yourself,” “you don’t need anyone but yourself,” etc., etc. And while I agree to a point — that we should be comfortable in our own skin, alone with ourselves — I’m also the first to advocate for the need to share community.
Solo travel is an amazing thing. It throws you headfirst into being alone. You might start your journey with a friend or two, and you’ll absolutely meet people along the way — but most long-term travelers I’ve met eventually end up going solo.
Itineraries don’t align, budgets shift, someone has to go home… the reasons are endless. But the end result is the same: here we are, a group of solo travelers whose biggest complaint isn’t weak wifi or lack of great food. It’s loneliness.
So, now, for the overshare in hopes it helps you in some way.
Many years ago, a well-meaning friend asked me: “Can’t you just move to a small town and settle down? You’ll meet someone marriage-minded.”
My immediate answer was no. But after six years of travel, I decided to give it a try.
Spoiler: I did meet someone. I fell madly in love. And yet… I was miserable. The only happy thing I had in life was him.
First came the weight gain, then the moodiness. Finally, I did what any sane woman would do: I packed my things and left.
Looking back, I can say with certainty that I am happier traveling and alone than living in a small town that doesn’t fit who I am. Looking forward, I hope one day I’ll meet my traveling soulmate. But who knows what the future holds.
That’s the thing about being a traveler — we don’t necessarily seek this life. It’s just who we are. We can run from it, but ultimately, it’s where we’re happiest.
How I live that life has shifted: I started with a home base, then went into full-time travel, and now I keep two bases.
As for the loneliness factor? That’s something I’ve been working on quietly. It won’t be forever — I do have a solution for this, and I’m excited to share when it’s ready.
Until then, the best advice I have is: keep traveling. Find your community wherever you land.